Puff Piece

The Michael-Phelps-caught-smoking-pot-story is a tempest in a bong. By now, most Americans understand that pot isn't any worse for you than booze. Personally, I'd rather have a stoned driver coming towards me at 40 miles an hour than a drunk one going twice as fast, hurtling across the median line. So what are we to make of this good old boy sheriff down in South Carolina, who had his men burst into a frat house, guns drawn, in search of an incriminating bong that might have Michael Phelps' DNA on it? It's a frat house, for heaven's sake. The surprising thing is that they DIDN'T find a bong. Michael Phelps had the discipline, character and athleticism to win 14 gold medals. I'd say he's earned the right to unwind and smoke a little dope.

It's time this country got over its hypocrisy and legalized pot. After all, it's a lot less dangerous than the grotesque binge drinking that kills a dozen or so college students each year. Most intriguingly, legalization could be a huge boost to our flailing economy by creating thousands of employment opportunities, including:

• Agricultural jobs for farmers and farm workers

• Retail jobs for dispensaries and eventually cannabis cafes, the smoker's equivalent of a bar

• Trucking and distribution jobs

• Opportunities for entrepreneurs who want to sell pre-rolled or packaged pot, or pre-fab brownies and other treats

• Refining, processing and packaging jobs for factory workers

• Research positions for scientists who would finally be allowed to investigate THC's pharmaceutical properties

• Marketing, advertising and design jobs to market the pot to adults, just as hard liquor is marketed today

Then, there are the fringe benefits:

• More time for the cops to go after bad guys

• More room in the jails for actual hardened criminals, who we could put away for a longer time

• Fewer lives ruined by incarceration for a victimless "crime"

• Less congestion in the courts from trials for pot-related offenses

• Less business for murderous Mexican drug cartels

• Less hypocrisy in society in general

• Less fodder for sleeze ball "journalists" who spend their times trying to embarrass people like Michael Phelps