Wolf-Boy

I hear the gray wolf has been reintroduced to the wilds of Wyoming. This could work out well for us, because my son is maybe one D and a misdemeanor short of a wilderness program and I'm thinking the wolves would make more effective parents than we seem to be. The kid should adapt well: he already acts like he was raised by wolves. He can't be domesticated.The heavy metal music he listens to consists of mostly howls. He's largely nocturnal, preferring to hide out in his den during the day. He travels in a pack and wolfs down his food. Perhaps, after his stint with the wolves, he might come back more respectful: Wikipedia says the cubs are very deferential to their parents. If his surrogate wolf-mom starts to give him constructive criticism and he accuses her of biting his head off, she might get mad and actually do it - unlike his real mom who mostly bites her own tongue. And just think how well vulpine parenting worked out for Romulus and Remus: They grew up to found Rome. Which beats the hell out of working at the Burger King.